writing about things that i don’t want to write about, at any level? hmm. meta meta?
1. i’ve never written exact events in my story as i remember marriage. and i mean, anywhere. i never journaled about it, never took pictures, never captured it, except in my head and memory. and its my story, even if there were other players.
i’ve been challenged to write it, as a therapeutic tool. not here, not publicly, but in the world. because writing things down gives them power.
and also sets them on fire so they can float off.
2. i’d like to write about my mother-in-law. I’ve known her since I was 15. She was my first, most powerful example of the kind of woman I’d want to be, that I could be. I knew her long before I knew her children, or the father of my kids. She was my high school English teacher, and fierce. Unapologetic. Worldly. (she was from New York, after all)… I’m scared to write about her because I feel like its too risky, that there may be loss involved and I don’t want to get into it. I’m thrilled that I got to keep her in my life and I’m ever better for it. But I think if I start I will float off on waves of sadness.
3. Sex. I’m super at writing about it, and having it…but not here. I don’t really have a forum for writing about sex and relationships, because I claim this space as just my own, my own thoughts about things and I try not to include other people unless I am reacting or responding. BUT, its been pointed out that I am leaving so much unsaid that my story almost becomes untrue. And if I start? Hmm. That’s a whole different kind of blog, right?
Is that true, that leaving things out makes me untrue? I don’t think so. And yet, I’m caught on the snag of it.
And that’s today’s essay folks. love you, miss you, really want to kiss you. 🙂
What do you not talk about?