You do not have to… you do not need to.

This is a Cynthia Lee prompt, and in reaction to a Mary Oliver poem, Wild Geese.

Sigh. Exceptional poem. EXCEPTIONAL. Please just go inhale it.

To myself I say:

You do not have to pretend to have it all together. You do not have to show your disaster.

You do not have to look like the other moms. You do not have to make small talk just to prove your humanity.

You do not have to consider every single person’s point of view every time. You do not have to argue with yourself when you get an interesting idea.

You do not have to buy any more candy. You do not need to satisfy the unsatisfied.

You do not need to explain yourself again. You do not need to explain your bad dreams. You do not need to hurry through.

You do not need to demand anything from anyone.

You do not need to settle.

You do not need to brand, niche, conform to the ‘way to make money’ writing.

You do not need to give up. You do not need to wear beige just because it goes with everything. You do not need to make sense to anyone else.

What do you say?

love love,


background of natural green leaf with veins
Upclose leaf . Photo by Skylar Kang on


Oh Definitely: a Business Proposition.

The bath was good.

and, i don’t know man. the weight of these days is still here. I’m doing what i need to do, I have a therapy appt, a friend is going to hook me up with weight watchers, and i’m going to spend the day reading. I’m not even going to go get the tomato i need for the tacos. (tomato be damned. kids will eat beans, meat and cheese and be damn happy about it.)

here are some good words :

  1. jump
  2. popcorn
  3. wherewithal
  4. liminal
  5. rainbow (so damn literal and yet hardly.)
  6. burble
  7. knee (the knights that say Ni)
  8. sheep
  9. bologna
  10. marshmallow
  11. luminary

I think i’m a fan of the lumen. clearly.

these are words i jotted while in a class i am still taking in order to be a coach of sorts, to get people to see that they hold their own answers, and can actually figure their own shit out. how bout that? and while i think it is COMPLETELY worthwhile for someone to do this work, i’m embarrassed about it, for me.

because the blue collar in me poo-poos it. and it is so generational, and complex, just that sentence. has to do with my dad, and my utterly ridiculous self-identity as a toughie.

because i’m a total puff. marshmallow indeed. mostly.

partly, that is what is going to make me a great coach, because i love easily and freely. and want the best for all my people. the best of the best.

and how freaking obnoxious is that? is it going on a business card? am i going to frost my hair and wear crystals ?


i’m not in that good of a mood today. but really?

i am the statue of liberty baby. ‘give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free… ‘

yeah, i can point your ass in the right direction.

try me.