11/19/2020_ Ala Mariah Carey, sorry.

  1. All I want to do is go to salvation army, turn in my things and browse the rest of the Christmas items.
  2. All I want to do is buy stuff.
  3. And eat. I also want to eat a lot but still lose weight and fit better in my clothes. Cheese, I tell you, cheese. My mom is 75 and saying the same thing. I give myself til 70, then i will start smoking again and eat whatever the fuck i want.
  4. All I want is to have a little bit of certainty in my life. Is that a ghost? Is that a mirage, at this point? When death waits at the end of everything? What am I, delusional?
  5. All I want is two minutes in the same mood.
  6. All I want is for my kids to be happier. I know school sucks and teenagery years are full of vomit and exile and wretchedness sometimes, but this whole ‘not seeing friends’, not ‘bumping into people’ thing? Suckage.
  7. I inadvertently have a dog and a cat that are both pitch black. All I want is one room where the corners are not grey with fur. What the hell, All I want is one corner that stays hair free forever. Just one.
  8. All I want is to find the freaking book I can’t find. I searched the recycling bin today in case I recycled it in the box it came in. This was a dry search thankfully as paper and cardboard are rather pleasant to rifle. No luck though. Where the fuck did I put it?
  9. All I want is this exact house, but smaller, so there would be less cleaning. If every room were just ten percent smaller? Ideal. I do not know what I’m going to do when the next shoe drops. I guess sell. Which is all sorts of defeated. It does not bear looking into currently.
  10. All I want is to eat all the roasted vegetables. I just want someone else to peel and seed and chop. Its that whole personal chef thing again. I guess I’m just feeling wishy lately. Maybe that’s the real reason for the season? Or Season for this reason? To give us the hope to dream again? To give in to the darkness with a flickering light? Our little sparkles out there in the large dark winter. . .


What do you want? What does your list look like?

3 thoughts on “NOVEMBER NONO: Nineteen, ALL I WANT”

  1. Wants and wishes are like the wind that whips up the sea into crested waves frothing with foam as the water rolls around on top of the larger ocean beneath. What’s beneath your waves?

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