“The pleasure of abiding. The pleasure of insistence, of persistence. The pleasure of obligation, the pleasure of dependency. The pleasures of ordinary devotion.
The pleasure of recognizing that one may have to undergo the same realizations, write the same notes in the margin, return to the same themes in one’s work, relearn the same emotional truths, write the same book over and over again – not because one is stupid or obstinate or incapable of change, but because such revisitations constitute a life.” –
Maggie Nelson
This quote. This thing settled down on me like a net, slicing through me in geometries.
Its not, repeat and repeat until you finally learn the lesson, its not ‘cycle after cycle of the same lesson’ because you just cannot get it, you are so thick you fell for another addict…it is the revisitation that constitutes a life.
i’m not stupid, i’m just living.
JESUS. Pleasure, not trial.
PLEASURE.
I mix my hedonism with practicality, i do. but i wish more people could lighten up. get earthy with themselves.
there is so much in there, and i don’t even know how to begin to dig it up, to unearth it for you.
PLEASURE.
go find some.
i’m going to organize another raised bed for myself this spring. I might go wild and plant all flowers again. my kids don’t flipping eat vegetables, so what is the point of spinach? Maybe a pepper or two? I’ll have lavender to sell this year, barring pestilence.
Sigh.
Pleasure. run your hands through a bowl of rice if you have to. climb under the weighted blanket, or lover, or dog. whatever you got.
that quote. man, i am sliced.
there’s nothing wrong with you. you’re just living.
sigh.
-me
Love that word, abiding. “Abide with me,” a wonderful hymn. “help of the helpless, oh abide with me.” Abide: stay close, continue.
Yes, i love that word too. Its just beautiful and sounds like a song of peace.