i’m moving away a little from the shock and awe that caused this post, but it did, I had it.
my LM had a less than stellar response to a very old friend of mine who is related to my ex. I mean, his reaction was twofold, 1. A person who clearly loves me. 2. a very judgemental, class-oriented, conflicted criticizer.
now, these things are both true. but when you have loved someone for so long, you have a tendency to gloss over things, and put them on a pedestal of sorts.
there are so many questions;
*am I okay with this judgement because i’m usually on the winning side? ultimately, this one is a humdinger.
*I’ve always brushed off the criticisms, because of the longevity of the relationship and the humor that also always resides.
*how much do i let LM change my opinions? or am i just seeing the whole world in a new light? with a new mate who is not informed by decades of history?
*was it an incomplete love in the first place? that allowed me to do the glossing? can i absorb the new and complete version and still maintain the love and the pedestal?
how the hell do we love each other? we, complex, multiply-layered bodysacks of confusion? c’mon now… HOW?